Deep in the world of dating

Sorry, its been a while. If you remember, I was unclear in my intentions with the last guy I dated. I realized and questioned whether our lifestyles were viable, not to mention the distance between us. Physical distance, I mean. Turns out, it just wasn’t going to work for me. It’s going to be even more awkward when we go to Belize together. In honor of myself and dating, I felt it only appropriate to get my own room.  When you’re  dating, you  can’t expect these new guys to understand that you are sharing a room with someone you have no interest in dating or otherwise. Can you? I didn’t think so. Not appropriate. At all. The guy was saying “the guy you’re dating should understand you’re just friends with me.”. NIce try, but no go.  So I got my own room and it was expensive, but a peace of mind is priceless. Am I right?

So yes, while the Belize  guy just assumes I am dating, I have officially started wading in the dating pool once again. Deeply wading. Online. The scammers are still there; in fact, I talked to one the other day. They are so easy to spot, then you can call them out on it. I have told two so far they are absolute frauds. However, I have been out with two people and like one in particular. I have a second date this Saturday, so we shall see; My boundary that I  am firm on is monogamy .I have even told this new guy that I am fine if he is not ready for the move toward monogamy ,but he knows there will be no sex till then. It’s just my thing. I feel like if I value myself, i am going to not only tell them my boundary, but at least as importantly, I am going to stick to it! This guy is hard to read, but he seems interesting and interested. He could be really genuine and honest about not being ready,. And/or he could be a total player and wants to not give that up till the last minute.  I don’t know. But if I take it slow (what a concept!), these things will figure themselves out. I’ll find out more Saturday evening while we cook some dinner and drink some Cabernet.  This is the deal; I know what I want. I am going to be patient and wait for him to figure it out for himself. I have time.  He told me the other day “You’re sexy as fuck and you’re really pretty”. Are these two mutually exclusive qualities?  Is this a compliment or what?! I think it is, but I will wait that out also. And last night he even admitted  that he’s glad we waited on our first date. Since it was .our first date after all. I told him it can wait and I am worth it. Because I am.

 

 

London & Paris, oh my!

I just got the dates for my trip and I am so excited. For those who may remember my Paris trip last year, I have decided to revisit Paris. For those who weren’t around then, you can see one of my dedicated posts here: Paris, Part Two: Arriving In Paris.

I have decided that for my 50th birthday upcoming  (quite a few months away and shortly after the trip), i would plan a slightly bigger trip than last year. I have added a layer of complexity to the plans by adding London to the mix.  I will be visiting  London first, then Paris. I am planning on four nights in London; on the fifth full day, I will be taking the train from London to Paris; there i will spend the rest of my time till the next Friday. I have my Paris housing almost set; I just need to put down a deposit. I need to figure out  where I want to stay in London. Kensington or Hyde Park sounds good. Maybe Notting Hill. I just want a safe and centralized location to stay. If you have any thoughts or actual places, let me know; I have been checking out Air BnB, but I have found little availability during my proposed week (which is non-negotiable as this is my granted Paid Time Off that I signed up for).   I think I need to make a list of the sights I want to see.

I plan on utilizing the Metro & the Undergrouond a l to and I will have travel passes on both public transportation systems. I may also buy the London Pass and the Paris Pass to get to see the passes and have some days of unlimited travel.

 

Stay tuned!!

Getting honest…

Sooo, I have turned a corner in my life. I am ready to blog about my former marriage and divorce and  its hard. Oh so hard to even think about.  I have procrastinated too long; and by too long, I simply mean since October. This is going to unfold slowly.  I want to share the experience of my marriage and divorce and what happened to land me back in the world of dating and single life.

Bear with me. I will work on posting about this relationship, not only the marriage and divorce and life post-divorce, but also the courtship in the beginning.  I will  still post about fitness, current relationships, etc in between. When you’re reading my posts, I invite you to comment or email me about what I have written. I won’t fall apart or get upset.. I got divorced in 2011; things are much better for me now.. I just want to be as raw and honest and in the moment as I possibly can to express the palpable fear and stress I lived with almost daily.  There was no physical abuse. The fear comes from emotional mistreatment and my ex-husband’s anger issues.  And I will be explicit in my story of getting through it all. And how that happened. I’ll give you a hint: family and friends. But I am getting way ahead of myself.  These posts will reveal personal information about those other than me, but I will be keeping their identity completely anonymous as I have on this blog thus far. My hope is that my story will not only help people realize they are not alone, but the telling of my experience will be liberating as well.

Also, please please please: If you have any advice on how to get this on a blog or how I should proceed, by all means, drop me a line  by email or comment below.

On that note, I will let all my readers know that I am going back east to visit family this weekend and won’t return till Wednesday; I haven’t decided if i am bringing my iPad, so you may hear from me.

Have a fantastic week and I will definitely be back next week!!

A vision board: an intention in itself

So, I am thinking of creating a vision board. What do you think? I think it’s the perfect time, wrapping up 2018, while taking stock of my goals and dreams for 2019. I think it will take some time to work through magazines and see what is going to pop out and grab my attention.

What do you think?  I want to blog more, travel more , save more money; that’s for starters.  I want to stay true to myself and my values and my goals and maybe getting this down on a vision board would help me reach my daily, monthly or yearly affirmation

Please drop a comment if you have experience with creating a vision board or have input on how they worked for you.  I’d love to hear from you!

 

 

TRX, treadmills and yoga, oh my!

So, I’m finally getting in the rhythm of a good work out schedule. My trainer gave me a great app that holds me accountable. Or tries to at least! I am trying to work out three to four times a week. Three times a week is much more doable because of my 10 hour shifts at work. I work 4 days, so at least I can carve out time on my days off and maybe get to yoga in the morning of a noon start time at work.

I have a strength endurance day, hypertrophy day, and a stability day…then yoga. I think this week I will be able to get in two days of work out and yoga in between. I am going away Friday morning for a work conference and won’t get my  normal Friday and Saturday work outs. With each of these works outs, I have a metabolic conditioning cardio walk on the treadmill.  As for the different types of exercise, I am still getting used to the routines and sometimes feel self-conscious completing the exercises at the gym, but feel so good when I am done. I just did tomorrow’s regimen last Friday with my trainer, so I think I feel comfortable with that.  The machines come this Thursday for me and that’s my hypertrophy day. I am not quite comfortable with the machines; I think I may be intimidated on them because of all the people working on them that seem to know exactly what they are doing. I guess practice makes perfection.  Progress, not perfection….

Then I get yoga  this Wednesday! Yay! Yoga at my gym is available for free every day. There are different types of yoga and I am really enjoying Surrender and Root yoga. I am not yet ready for Flow. Flow moves very fast and I am not quite comfy with the different poses and by the time I get the poses nailed, they are moving quickly to the next pose I don’t know very well. With Surrender and Root, I get to hold the poses for a while. I get to be very acquainted with each movement and each breath.  It really works my core, my focus, my breathing. I love it. It can be really challenging – yoga almost always pushes me past my comfort  level each and every time.

Overall, things are going mostly well at the gym, as you can see. What is lacking in my health journey is my nutrition. I was doing well and then I just got lazy; there is not another good explanation that wouldn’t just sound like the excuse that it s.  SO yes, lazy. I want to return to a healthy living style and leave out the carbs and the sugar. Those are my biggest offensive areas of my diet that screw me over every time; Since the spring, I have gained back 18 pounds. I would like to lose them again. You see, I know exactly what I have to do here. It is not rocket science. Veggies and protein have always worked for me with minimal fats and carbs (not totally absent).  I need to just cut out sugar and be done with it. No more candy corns, no more gummy bears.

I have a resting metabolic assessment on November 3rd and I’d really like to get some good eating habits in before then that will show up on the assessment. Wish me luck!!

Any comments, advice or ideas? Drop me a line or leave a comment!!